Untaught Leadership Lessons: Insights from an MBA and Beyond

In June 2025, I completed my MBA, just a few years after earning my Doctorate in Educational Leadership. Thirteen months of intensely focused leadership by day, followed by studying and writing at night and on weekends, have been both an accomplishment and an awakening. While the doctorate taught me about the relational and cultural dimensions of leadership in international education, as well as how to build trust, foster inclusion, and navigate the human dynamics of schools, the MBA equipped me with the business and commerce tools necessary to lead schools as complex organizations.

Each MBA course, from Organizational Theory and Behavior to Financial Management, broadened my perspective. I learned to engage confidently in financial discussions and to align operations with the mission. I learned to analyze data without losing sight of people and to see not only the invisible cultural forces of trust and behavior but also the business realities that underpin them.

But here’s the hard truth: those lessons alone would not have saved me from myself.

Because no MBA course taught me how to unlearn what decades in education had embedded in me: that worth is tied to productivity, that working late is noble, that being “busy” is a badge of honor. In fact, a decade ago, I wrote a blog in which I glorified the cult of busy. But schools, beautiful, inspiring, and exhausting, can become factories of ever-ratcheting goals: more students, better scores, higher benchmarks, endless “more.”

It has taken my own lived experience and the wisdom of mentors to understand the cost of that mindset.

• Brett Penny once reminded me, “Tosca, your busy is no more important than anyone else’s busy.”
• Jacquie Pender told me, “All these kids will become amazing, literate, numerically fluent adults; you working until 10 PM doesn’t give them any greater advantage.”
• And my mentor, Isobel Willard, quietly but firmly taught me, “You can’t help students to be healthy unless you are healthy yourself.”

At almost 50, I am dealing with Sternocleidomastoid Syndrome. It's a fancy name for a really big pain in the neck- literally. Don’t worry, I'm seeing an Osteopath and Chiropractor, and it's getting better. But I want to help young leaders who are holding tension, hunching over keyboards, sitting for hours, or internalizing stress. I now understand what no syllabus, degree, or certificate prepared me for: leadership requires rest. Wellness is not a luxury; it’s your leadership capital.

I work out five days a week. I’ve been a vegetarian since 1998. And yet, despite doing “everything right,” I still tend to push myself past healthy limits because I am stuck in a mindset, and now I have to learn the unlearnable lesson of self-care in a profession that needs to model it better.

Killoran: A photo of wildflower and Moutains in the background in Jasper National Park, Alberta

Here are six ridiculously simple strategies that leaders, including myself, can adopt to be healthier:

1. Learn to breathe. Intentional breathing before meetings, during tricky conversations, or simply at your desk helps lower cortisol and sharpen focus. Learn more with Seated 360 Breathing, or Headspace.
2. Take time to eat. Not at your desk. Not a coffee and a cookie. Sit down, eat, and let your nervous system reset. Learn more about the timing of eating and what works best for you.
3. Drink water. Fill a bottle at the start of each day. Drink it. Refill it. Your body and brain need it. Learn more about optimizing your water intake.
4. Schedule and stick to boundaries. Set times for emails, calls, and meetings, and guard them fiercely. Being “on” 24/7 helps no one. Learn about the ineffectiveness of overscheduling.
5. Make time for exercise and for people you love. A 20-minute walk, a coffee with a friend, a shared laugh, these moments are what actually sustain you.
6. Get into nature, or if needed, bring nature to you. Regular time in green spaces reduces stress, improves mood, and even lessens pain (Steininger et al., 2025). If you’re in a big city without easy access to forests or parks like me, innovative technology like virtual reality “forest bathing” has been shown to enhance recovery from stress and improve focus (Ascone et al., 2025). Whether it’s a walk among trees, tending plants at home, or using VR to immerse yourself in nature, prioritize this connection, and your mind and body will thank you.

We enter leadership hoping to lead differently, better. Take the time to model balance, to take care of ourselves, and to remind others that their worth is not measured solely by metrics.

What drives a school forward isn’t sheer effort from its leaders, but intentional, balanced action.

References and Further Reading

Ascone, L., Mostajeran, F., Mascherek, A., Tawil, N., Knaust, T., Samaan, L., & Kühn, S. (2025). Multi- vs. unimodal forest-bathing in VR to enhance affective and cognitive recovery after acute stress. Journal of Environmental Psychology, 105, 102637. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jenvp.2025.102637

Benton, D., Jenkins, K. T., Watkins, H. T., & Young, H. A. (2016). Minor degree of hypohydration adversely influences cognition: A mediator analysis. The American Journal of Clinical Nutrition, 104(3), 603–612. https://doi.org/10.3945/ajcn.116.132605

Bostock, S., Crosswell, A. D., Prather, A. A., & Steptoe, A. (2019). Mindfulness on-the-go: Effects of a mindfulness meditation app on work stress and well-being. Journal of Occupational Health Psychology, 24(1), 127–138. https://doi.org/10.1037/ocp0000118

Henning, R. A., Jacques, P., Kissel, G. V., Sullivan, A. B., & Alteras-Webb, S. M. (1997). Frequent short rest breaks from computer work: Effects on productivity and well-being at two field sites. Ergonomics, 40(1), 78–91. https://doi.org/10.1080/001401397188396

Hopper, S. I., Murray, S. L., Ferrara, L. R., & Singleton, J. K. (2019). Effectiveness of diaphragmatic breathing for reducing physiological and psychological stress in adults: A quantitative systematic review. JBI Evidence Synthesis, 17(9), 1855–1876. https://doi.org/10.11124/JBISRIR-2017-003848

Hunter, R. F., de la Haye, K., Murray, J. M., Badham, J., Valente, T. W., Clarke, M., & Kee, F. (2019). Social network interventions for health behaviours and outcomes: A systematic review and meta-analysis. PLOS Medicine, 16(9), e1002890. https://doi.org/10.1371/journal.pmed.1002890

Shi, Y., She, Z., Li, D., Zhang, H., & Niu, K. (2021). Job crafting promotes internal recovery state, especially in jobs that demand self-control: A daily diary design. BMC Public Health, 21, 1924. https://doi.org/10.1186/s12889-021-11915-1

Steininger, M. O., White, M. P., Lengersdorff, L., Zhang, L., Smalley, A. J., Kühn, S., & Lamm, C. (2025). Nature exposure induces analgesic effects by acting on nociception-related neural processing. Nature Communications, 16(1). https://doi.org/10.1038/s41467-025-56870-2

Van Cutsem, J., De Pauw, K., Marcora, S., Meeusen, R., & Roelands, B. (2017). The effects of mental fatigue on physical performance: A systematic review. Sports Medicine, 47, 1569–1588. https://doi.org/10.1007/s40279-016-0672-0